Posted by Lil Miss Hot Mess on October 29, 2009
Things have been a little heavy around here lately. Sorry for that. Hopefully this will lighten the mood!
Last Sunday I had the pleasure of not only seeing The Gossip in concert (again this year!), but also of going back stage to hang out with them. Oh. My. God. First of all, I owe major major thanks to Jerry Lee, who the day-of, when I still didn’t have a ticket, asked me if I wanted one and said “oh, by the way, I think they’re all access.” !!!!! When he said that I knew it was time to shave and put on mama’s face.
(And, for the record, I should actually be thanking the wonderful Tara Perkins, their tour manager and former mama of the Sex Workers’ Art Show tour, who really sealed the deal. It was great to see her, and I said it once, but I’ll say it again: she looks great as a blonde.)
So a couple words of wisdom to share before we got there:
When we got there, we went backstage. It was funny, because the only other time I’d been to the Regency was for the Trannyshack Kiss-Off Party, where I served drinks to Heklina and the girls backstage. Which is to say: hanging out with stars backstage is only natural to me.
Beth Ditto was sitting in one of the tiny rooms with a cute friend of hers from high school, and his even cuter boyfriend. She knew Jerry a bit, so screamed his name when she saw him and then asked me mine after. When I told her she asked me, “Sweetie, are you drunk and on drugs?” I told her “no, but we’ll see.” Foreshadowing.
It was cute — lots of San Francisco queers who either lived in Olympia at some point or know Tara. Beth clearly had fun being the center of attention, and enjoyed the gifts people brought her, including a plastic pumpkin filled with candy, condoms, and hand sanitizer. She ate olives out of a jar (which were on the rider), and talked about high school and her family and Olympia, and said she was going to keep eating the olives until she couldn’t reach them in the jar. She also smoked cigarettes, had a juicer (though I didn’t see it in action), and drank throat-coat tea. I drank some (well, a lot of some) of her wine.
And just for a moment of politics: fuck people who act like they’ve sold out. They’ve gotten “bigger,” they’ve changed a bit, fine. But until Beth starts hawking McDonalds or Bank of America or some bullshit like that, I’m fine with it. It is amazing to see this beautiful, talented, sassy, political, fat, queer, working-class, femme from Arkansas be on the move. And it’s amazing to see her working it in designer fashion every now and then. Street cred be damned, because girl’s got it.
Overall, the show was fantastic, though I was a little drunker than I’d realized. (I realized later it was four, not three, glasses of wine, which is a lot for this one. Be careful what you wish for, honey.) MEN (JD from Le Tigre’s new band) was pretty cute and fun, especially with their giant props that Chris and Greg got to be in charge of. But, whoa, Beth Ditto can sing. She was complaining about being hoarse, but I would kill to have her pipes on a bad day. And she’s just so in control. I couldn’t help screaming along with a lot of the songs, which hopefully didn’t drive people too crazy. I was jealous when friends from backstage ran out, and Jerry dove off the stage but fell on his ass. Is this not the stuff that dreams are made of?
Later, we all went to Paradise Lounge (which I’d never been to and, for the record, reminded me of the under-18 “club” attached to the roller-skating rink in high school), where fags just attacked Beth and the others. (I should add that while I spent most of my time that night around Beth — and “around” is probably the most appropriate word — I also met Hannah, who seemed like a giant sweetheart in that way that I tend to fall in love with butch women/genderqueers.) Apparently I flirted with boys, but of course that’s the part that I don’t remember so clearly! I called it quits a little early, because darling, sometimes you need to while you’re ahead.
And now the pictures, mostly courtesy of BrownDownCrown:
In case you didn’t believe it. And I think that was glass of wine 2 of 3 (not counting the white zin).
This boy claimed to be a bigger hot mess than me. See below for proof otherwise. Also, doesn’t he look like it’s his job to pose like this? I have no idea who he was or if we were flirting.
Beth and I are clearly in love. I secretly wish we had a more formal/posed shot too, but I wouldn’t trade this for the world.
Bearzbub must have heard that there was a “hot mess” challenge going on because he came out of nowhere to put me in my place. I never do my lips that big — it was a mistake that turned into an opportunity — but honestly, ths photo scares me a little bit.
So, if you missed the concert, you should probably be sad. You should also listen to the concert that was on NPR, though it’s not as good. (Although, Carrie Brownstein sounds like she’s announcing at the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, which is creepy and amazing.) You should also find people who know people and start talking.
Posted by Lil Miss Hot Mess on October 23, 2009
Mama’s doing this show, but there was a slight miscommunication so my name’s not on the flyer. I don’t have an ego about it, but trust me that I’ll be there and that I’m so excited to do a new number about US-Israel relations. More details forthcoming!
Posted by Lil Miss Hot Mess on October 20, 2009
Professor Melissa Harris-Lacewell’s article in The Nation is perhaps the most balanced and thoughtful piece on marriage I’ve read, possibly ever, and certainly in a long time. I still think marriage is the wrong goal for a queer movement, but I think she does a really nuanced job of sorting through some tough questions and seeming contradictions. It’s nice to read passages like this from someone who is a self-described “marriage equality advocate”:
Our work must be not just about marriage equality, it should also be about equal marriages, and about equal rights and security for those who opt out of marriage altogether.
So what are we to make of marriage? It is both a deeply personal relationship for which people will make almost unthinkable sacrifices, and it is a declining social institution offering little security for most who enter it.
As a black, feminist, marriage-equality advocate I reside at an important intersection in this struggle. This movement must acknowledge the unique history of racial oppression, while still revealing the interconnections of all marriage exclusion. This work must reflect the feminist critique of marriage, while still acknowledging the ancient, cross cultural, human attachment to marriage. This work must be staunchly supportive of same-sex marriage, while rejecting a marriage-normative framework that silences the contributions of queer life.
I would still push back that a lot of seems to be not about marriage as a state institution, but rather about committed relationships in a general sense. The two are clearly related, but not synonymous. But ultimately I appreciate her ability to make this conversation an “and” rather than an “or.”
Posted by Lil Miss Hot Mess on October 19, 2009
I’ve been watching a few different trailers at/for work today for the upcoming film Precious – I’ve been wanting to see this film ever since I read about it post-Sundance, and now I want to see it so badly! Here’s the review from Variety.
Thankfully it opens November 6. Start waiting in line, girls.
Posted by Lil Miss Hot Mess on October 17, 2009
I just went to the anti-war march and rally at Civic Center. While the event itself was kind of frustrating — small, very sectarian, not the most well-organized — it’s a good reminder that it has been eight years since the US invaded Afghanistan. I was in high school when it started. And when I told my housemate I was going, she stopped herself before asking “what war?” as if there was some new war on the horizon. It feels trite, but I think the reminder that the US is constantly at war is necessary and always timely.
I’m not sure what the best course of action is at the moment — for the US government, or for activists — but it seems that at the very least we need to be pressuring Nobel laureate (!) Obama and our members of Congress for no more troops and a responsible exit strategy. Here’s a round-up of some ideas for taking action.
Also, not completely related (well, mostly because of US aggression in the region), but I attended the Arab Film Festival’s two opening night films on Thursday. If you haven’t checked out the schedule, try to make it to one of the great programs!